Bush: Better Than Buchanan

The San Francisco voter guide is always good for a few laughs, but this election's edition is pure comedy gold...thanks to Measure J.

Measure J calls for the impeachment of Bush and Cheney. Like all municipal measures that make a statement on national or international issues, it's a joke. (Really, now: does anyone really think anyone else in the country cares what San Francisco thinks about the president?) My normal policy is to vote against them all, but I'll vote for this one because...well...impeachment. Still: joke.

And yet, the bemused chuckle I had at the measure itself was nothing compared to my helpless hysterical laughter at the arguments against it.

The rebuttal argument begins with a bizarre non-sequitur ("VOTE "NO!" ON THIS ROSEMARY'S BABY IMPEACHMENT RESOLUTION:" - and that's a whole sentence full of wtf?) and takes a couple of swipes at the Board of Supervisors before getting down to making the case against impeachment:

On the merits, this impeachment resolution is unjustified. An impeachment resolution against Democrat James Buchanin [sic] - generally rated as our worst U.S. President (1857 to 1861)¹ - would have been more justified...Far more.

Buchanin's mistakes helped bring about the American Civil War. His ardently pro-slavery Vice-President - John C. Breckenridge - later became a Confederate General.

Next to Buchanin and Breckenridge, Bush and Cheney are innocent lambs.

That's it. That's the best they can do. Look at what hypocrites those Democrats are! They support impeaching the Republican Bush, but they give a free ride to the Democrat Buchanin [sic]!

Is this what we've come to? Are the Republicans test-marketing a new slogan (Bush: Not as bad as Buchanin [sic]!)? I have to wonder...after all, they really don't have much else to stand on, do they?

In any case, once this election is over I'm going to start lobbying my supervisors to call for the impeachment of Buchanin [sic]. Which, let's face it, would be just as effective as calling for the impeachment of Bush.


¹To distinguish him from all the other presidents named Buchanin [sic].

[That's all, folks]