I was organizing my e-mail at work in preparation for the enforced archiving that begins tomorrow (long story; it's a fucking nightmare. Okay, not so long.) and ran across this minute order issued in a case I worked on several years ago, which I saved for its entertainment value:
The hearing on the motions scheduled for [date] is vacated indefinitely. Given the Court's packed calendar, the largely hypothetical and transparently exaggerated contentions the parties have chosen to press, and the typically (and probably unnecessary) huge volume of paperwork the parties have filed, it may well be a very long time before the Court turns to these motions. As to whether [Party A] has to explore the pleasures of litigating in the Rehabilitation Court, perhaps it would be prudent for [Party B] and [Party A] to work out some arrangement between themselves.Tell us what you really think, Your Honor.